“BEWARE THE JABBERING WOOKIE”

This warning could apply to a plethora of talking heads in the media today. With our never ending political campaigning cycles, each time a politician appears it is a campaign stop. We are also plagued with self appointed “experts” like Hannity, Beck, Limbaugh and the like. I have identified their politicians as “ Wookies”, those large hairy creatures that speak in grunts and growls that only they understand. Normal humans are not privileged to understand these howlers because they are “experts” on politics and life in general. The “experts” I have identified as “ass kissers” and “liars”

This description is of one of the Republican (female) hopefuls running for President as told by a member of her staff to a young reporter when asked what he could expect when meeting her.

“Beware the Jabbering Wookie, my son! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch! Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun the frumious Bandersnatch!”

These Wookies have taken it upon themselves to invade our private thoughts and actions. They have interposed themselves in our lives to such an extent that they have become a neurosis on the American psyche.

I think the solution may lie in this quote from Lewis Carroll’s “Through The Looking Glass”:

“He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought--
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.

And as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! and through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.”

It seems these Jabbering Wookies have been with mankind through the ages and the only way to rid us of them is to use a “vorpal sword”. It does look like an ideal solution to the problem, however I believe since Mr. Carroll’s time the beheading of politicians is frowned upon and my even be illegal in some states.

So what are we left with to rid humanity of these Jabbering Wookies? I know of a few things that are deadly to these creatures and could be used to save the human race. They cannot live without unlimited supplies of money. They cannot live without talking. They cannot function without many ass kissing followers. They cannot communicate without someone to write their speech. They cannot live without cameras taking photos and videos being taken of them. They seem to show no need for food air and water like most living organisms, giving us a very big clue. They may not be human! So we all know the remedies, let’s get’em